Sometimes God puts you in places you never expected to be. And sometimes, those places teach you lessons you didn’t even know you needed.
Recently, I attended a father and child breakfast at my four year old son’s school in Union City, Georgia. As a first time father entering the school system, I’m learning how important it is to be involved. I want my son to know his dad has his back, no matter what.
But this particular morning turned into something much bigger than a Dad and Son breakfast.
I Just Wanted to Eat Breakfast and Go Home
I had just gotten off shift at the fire station. It had been a busy night, and I was tired. Mind you, I live in McDonough, so I already had a drive ahead of me.
When I signed in, someone mentioned a conference for fathers afterward.
My first thought? Absolutely not!
I came to eat breakfast with my son, take him to class, and go home to sleep lol
But after being asked several times, I finally agreed to stay a little while longer. I figured another 15 to 30 minutes wouldn’t hurt.
Walking into that cafeteria, I couldn’t believe my eyes….
The room was packed with fathers.
I’m used to seeing mothers heavily involved in school activities, and they deserve every bit of recognition for that. But seeing almost an entire cafeteria filled with dads was something special.
Even the speaker seemed surprised by the turnout.
And before anyone takes this the wrong way, this isn’t a knock against fathers who couldn’t attend. People have jobs, responsibilities, and circumstances that make being present difficult.
Still, it was a beautiful sight.
One Question Changed Everything
As the conference started, I was still thinking about getting home no lie
Then the speaker asked one simple question:
“When did your dad say ‘I love you’?”
Man.
The atmosphere changed.
A room that had been filled with conversations and movement suddenly seemed quiet.
And just like that, I was paying attention.
As men, many of us grow up hearing the same messages. Be tough. Don’t cry. Don’t show weakness. Handle your business.
Somewhere along the way, expressing love can become uncomfortable.
But why?
Why should a child have to wait until adulthood, or worse, until a parent is on their deathbed, to hear those three words?
“I love you.”
Three simple words that can mean everything to a child.
We Forget What Being a Child Felt Like
Watching those children that morning reminded me of something.
They were excited! Not because of expensive gifts or some big celebration, but because their dads were sitting beside them eating breakfast.
I remember how I felt whenever my mom showed up at my school. Just seeing her made my day. I felt safe, protected, and loved.
My mom played both roles in many ways, and I’ll forever appreciate her for that.
This isn’t about taking anything away from mothers. Their sacrifices and contributions are priceless.
But fathers matter, too.
Sometimes we get so caught up in working, paying bills, handling responsibilities, and getting through another day that we forget what those little moments mean to our children.
And sometimes, simply showing up is the biggest gift we can give them.
Changing the Story Starts With Us
During the conference, I had an opportunity to speak. I told those fathers something I truly believe.
What we witnessed that morning probably wouldn’t make the news.
We hear so much negativity about families and fathers, but here was a cafeteria filled with men showing up for their children.
That’s something worth celebrating. A step in the right direction
I believe we need more gatherings like this. They won’t change everyone, but they might reach somebody.
They certainly reached me.
My son is only four…. I’ve got a lot to learn about being a father, and I’m nowhere near perfect. But one thing I know is that I want him to grow up knowing he’s loved.
If you didn’t receive the love or affection you needed growing up, that doesn’t mean the story has to repeat itself.
We have the opportunity to break those generational cycles.
And it starts with us.
I later learned the gathering was called “Reel Dads”, and I’m thankful for the people who made that morning possible. I genuinely believe God had a reason for keeping me in that room when all I wanted to do was go home.
So I’ll leave you with the same question that stopped me in my tracks.
When did your father say, “I love you”?
And if you’re a parent reading this, here’s another question.
When was the last time you told your child?
Don’t wait for a special occasion. Hug them. Encourage them. Show up for them.
Most importantly, tell them you love them.
Because one day, those little moments might become the memories they carry for the rest of their lives.
